canada 2009

as we did last year, my roommies from New Tribes Bible Institute got together for a weekend of fun. i just love these girls!! last year kristyl hosted us in her home in michigan and this year sharon hosted us in Sarnia, Ontario, Canada.


mostly we just sat around and talked, catching up with what's been going on in eachothers lives in the past year. being adults brings a whole new line of conversation compared to when we were in college. struggles with marriage, jobs, having children, trying to have children, family, money (well, we talked about money when we were in college but we were okay with not having money then!!! :) one big excursion we made was to go get fries from under the bluewater bridge. apparently Sarnia is known for their french fries and people make it a special stop when traveling across the bridge to get fries. oh, it was heavenly! great fries, just by themselves since they are hand cut and freshly cooked, then get a nice spritz of vinegar and salt before being served. however, i did partake in the large serving of poutine. yummmmmmy :) also we had deep fried pickles. well, you should just watch the video.


let me introduce the characters :)



me of course
elisa

kristylsharon and her husband brandon
**Okay, so i am having a ton of technical difficulties posting video right now. i'll have to update w/ video later.

the next visit will be held here in vancouver and believe me, much craziness will ensue. i already have so many places in mind that i want to take the girls to it's just a matter of time!

post of pics

we took jesse and two of my mom's old day care kids to the park...typical face for him :)

us at the oregon zoo

bekah, becky and me at the beth moore conference @ memorial colluseum. absolutely life changing! so much fun, great worship and 7,000 other women being touched by the Holy Spirit through that wonderful woman.

a march trip to cannon beach w/ friends

this video is of us using a GINORMOUS piece of kelp as a jump rope. oh the entertainment one can find at the beach :) darlene was on camera duty, feng and i were swinging the 'rope' and nicole and debbi were the athletes

It's been a long time

Hello :)
i took a sabatical from blogging basically because my life was pretty boring for a while :) i have moved back in with my parents for a while to pay off my debt and save some money. this savings will either go to purchasing a condo or getting me back on my feet in an apartment so i can pursue education.
currently i am considering going to nursing school at clark which means i need to complete my prerequisites in a few sciences. i am not afraid of the courses since i love science and am in such a different place than i was when i was at clark years ago. okay, so i am actually in the same physical place, living w/ mom and dad but in a much different place emotionally and in my maturity. :)
if you have known my educational hopes in the past 6 months you might be wondering what happened to midwifery and lactation consulting. well, i have not given up on these but have moved them to the back of the educational line. while i could work independently as a lactation consultant, i would like to have the option of working in a hospital as it provides a more stable work schedule. the same goes for midwifery. in washington and oregon midwives and lactation consultants can practice outside of the hospital in homes and in birthing centers. however, this requires me to make a significant investment in supplies/facility that is a risk i don't really want to take. i grew up watching my parents struggle in their home-based businesses and i just don't like the insecurity of maybe or maybe not having 'customers'. to work in a hospital requires an RN for lactation and a masters degree in midwifery for being a nurse midwife. thus my decision to pursue my RN before anything else. besides, maybe going through my labor and delivery rotation will completely turn me off to the birth process...at least i have other options as an RN!
i have started going back to therapy on a weekly basis (i was down to once a month) and am hoping it will be a big help. i am just unable to take my antidepressants because of all the physical side effects, though the medicine works SO WELL to regulate my moods. i see a nice christian woman, which makes it easier to talk about all of my issues. she is able to offer support on an emotional, physical and spiritual level and i think that makes all the difference in the world when dealing with depression. though i am not a person who thinks that praying harder and reading your bible more will cure your mood disorder, spirituality definitely plays a part in recovering from these issues.
i have been having a ton of fun lately with my nephew jesse! we have been to the parks, the oregon zoo, we shop, cook and of course color. he's so well behaved and has such a great personality, i just love him being around. he likes coming over here too because he gets special blueberry 'pannycakes' and he also likes to chase and play with maggie.
i guess that's a brief synopsis of some of my life recently. i'll post a blog entry of pictures, and then one about my most recent trip to see my college roommies from NTBI.

oh....just a teensy bit of conviction

tonight at bible study beth moore shared some verses from isaiah 58 concerning the outpouring of ourselves to God's glory. the message struck me, as she talked about moving OUT of recovery (from strongholds, addiction, emotional health) and INTO service. 'recovery' is not a state of being. it is not a place that we should be in for long drawn out periods of time. at some point we need to get over our issue and move on with God's desire for our life and pour our lives into others.
having struggled with depression for a lot of years off and on, i realize the point she is making. just like i cannot stay in a place of 'i am depressed', i cannot stay in a place of 'i am recovering from depression' forever. i have to deal with my issues, yes; but the point is not to stay in this place for longer than needed. stepping forth into a life that gives to others and holds nothing back is the ultimate step of faith, trusting that God will sustain me. i fondly remember the way i felt when i used to do youth and collegiate ministry. when i had no strength, patience, will or desire to look beyond myself and care for others i was given the strength, patience, will and desire to do so once i stepped out and did the thing. in the niv version of isaiah 58 verse 11 says that he will 'strengthen your frame (build you up and help you stand-these parentheses mine)' and 'you will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail (you will never run weary of doing good)' when we spend ourselves on others.
i am a pretty selfish person. i like 'things' more than people sometimes. i would rather someone be interested in my life than the other way around. i like sleeping in on the weekends more than getting up and heading out to do community service. i'd rather go to a movie in the evening than hand out emergency blankets to the homeless.
you get the picture.
but this heart attitude is not what will bring the harvest of God's glory to the world. it will only bring destruction (like the life outlined in chapter 59). this was a hard pill to swallow, but please pray for me as i digest it. my life has been called to be something else than what it is, and it's high time my good intentions became good deeds.

when did i become a fuddy duddy?

today at church (which was awesome by the way) there was a teenage boy sitting 3 rows in front of me. not only did he chew gum the entire time which i tend to think could only be very distracting for him during worship, but he was wearing a baseball cap. when i was a teenager i didn't like that people judged my peers for wearing hats to church. 'it's the heart that matters, not the appearance or dress'. today that changed. i was VERY bothered that this kid was wearing a hat and that his parents didn't make him take it off. i felt like asking him if he had a medical condition that required him to wear the hat and disrespect his worship. i figured that would be out of line, afterall, it IS the heart that the Lord looks at and i just need to get over myself. good lesson to re-learn.

lessons from my dog

you have probably read my blogs in the past mentioning my dog maggie; this is her! monday is her fourth birthday...don't let her bit of gray fool you :) she has been my little buddy for the last 4 years and i so enjoy having her around. she has even become a member of the whole family, being titled 'grandpuppy' by my mom and dad (who by the way were not dog people before her).

when i got her i wasn't expecting to learn anything from her, afterall, she's an animal. however, i have gleaned so much from this little canine and i thought i'd share some main points with you:

1. be careful when someone comes to the door, but once you know it's someone you like, be VERY EXCITED to see them. they are there to see YOU afterall.

2. cuddle with the people you love.

3. be willing to learn new things. especially when there is a treat at the end of your lesson.

4a. the simple act of being yourself is endearing

4b. the simple act of being yourself and doing what you were created and gifted to do brings worship to God.

5. whenever someone says 'you wanna go outside?' (or to a movie, game, etc) DO IT!

6. loyalty is very important

7. say hello to everyone you meet

8. to really get to know someone, you have to be open, vulnerable and willing to be a little uncomfortable (butt-sniffing comes to mind, though please let's leave that to the dogs)

now, there are a lot of other lessons i have learned from maggie, but these are some of the basics. i have also learned what it might be like for our Heavenly Father to deal with us...you parents out there can draw the same lesson from your relationship with your children. when she does something over and over again that she's not supposed to do, or she destroys something of mine, of course i am upset. in the end though, i still love her and want to see her do 'the right thing' a.k.a. not pee on the floor.
i am very thankful for maggie and her simple companionship. there have been times where she's the only 'friend' i felt i had, and she has been a great help to me through my times of intense anxiety.

happy 4th birthday to

magdalena juanita conchita alonzo riveres gonzales-gonzales

laid up

for some reason my back went out this evening. it hasn't been this bad in a few years so it kind of took me by surprise. i have a factured vertebra (T-9 to be exact) and it has the tendancy to put pressure on the nerves that come off of that part of the spine. when that happens my back freezes up and is extremely painful. i can't move, it hurts to breathe...just overall unpleasant. i called my mom to come over and rescue me, which she did. i crawled over to the door and unlocked it so she could come in...i felt like i needed one of those life alert necklaces "i've fallen and i can't get up!"
feeling a bit better now, and i'm at least able to sit up straight and walk slowly. gonna take it easy though for the next couple days and make a visit to my chiropractor on monday.
please pray for healing! :)